In 1995, Daniel Goleman wrote a book titled Emotional Intelligence. The term fascinated me. I was so curious to find out about Emotional Intelligence. In his book, Goleman describes Emotional Intelligence (EI) as having five parts:
Self-awareness – the ability to recognize and understand your moods, emotions, and drives as well as their effect on others.
Self-regulation – the ability to control or redirect your impulses especially when they are negative or disruptive. The ability to think before you act, to maintain professionalism at all times.
Motivation – a passion to work for reasons that go beyond money or status.
Empathy – the ability to understand where other people are coming from.
Social Skill – the proficiency to build relationships and influence others.
The first three parts of Emotional Intelligence have to do with you. How you perceive yourself, how you decide to regulate your behavior and whether or not you are self motivated. Most leaders have a healthy degree of self motivation or grit, the ability to move through the obstacles and focus on the goal at hand. Cadets get accepted into the United States Military Academy at West Point because they have a high IQ. New cadets get through their first grueling summer training session called Beast Barracks because they are self motivated and have grit! A high IQ alone will not get a cadet through Beast Barracks. Determination, self motivation, being a team player and the ability to withstand pain gets a new cadet through.
The last two parts of Emotional Intelligence have to do with how you interact with other people.
Leading a WOW culture takes a high degree of Emotional Intelligence.
In 1928, Dale Carnegie wrote the book How to Win Friends and Influence People which is all about developing interpersonal relationships. Carnegie never even mentioned IQ in his book. He wrote about common sense principles like the importance of remembering someone’s name and asking an other person what interests him/her. He believed in giving praise and talking about one’s own mistakes before criticizing others.
After learning about Emotional Intelligence, I decided to include the concept in my leadership development training programs. How could I not, it made so much sense to me and obviously to others. According to the Center for Creative Leadership, which is the world's largest institution devoted exclusively to leadership research and education, the primary causes of derailment in executives involve deficits in emotional competence.